Just as i'm finally willing to change my attitude, willing to bring back my human side and smile. It comes the IT department and blocks IM access...

There you go, social whore!. So you though you had found a way to actually enjoy your work time? SCREW IT!!. We cannot allow you to become a social person, because if you do, sooner or later you'll realize that you don't want to work in a boxed cubicle for a lifetime and leave us. We must protect you from social interaction and other things like joy and life. We need you trapped here, geek, isolated, if you lose the focus on the monitor more than two seconds, we'll punish you.

It's too late assholes! I'm outta herrre!

Recommended song: 'Audioslave - Show me how to live'

You wouldn't be human if you were unable to withdraw something you've stated as sacred-word before. To me, this was a weekend of contradictions, changed beliefs and clarified misconceptions.

It all comes down to the importance of friendships, social interaction and love in your life. I've said so many times in the past that i had no real friends but i really did, and i still do. Maybe i was not a loyal friend myself and so i felt [and feared that] i did not deserve loyalty in exchange, thus i thrusted no one and locked myself in this anti-social four-walled panorama, hurting my friends [and other people i care] along the way.

I let everyone [i care] believe that i had changed because of the golden piece of my puzzle, which was affecting everything around it. But that wasn't the truth. I changed myself, on my own, with no influence; and ended up screwing the puzzle on myself, on my very own, with no influence; lost the golden piece and other valuable happy pictures without realizing what i was doing.

Yeah, i'm down, but not out; and far from done. I've already started fightin' my chances and rebuilding the puzzle. The reason i got the golden piece in the very first place was because i was that kind of guy...

Recommended song: 'Incubus - Beware! Criminal'

Focus on the journey you're making always towards the destination of it, which shall make you happy in the end. But, treasure the things you find along the way, because that little things will make the story you tell about that journey in the future.

That little things always come unexpected and bring random glimpses of joy to your life. Smile back at them, enjoy that little moment of happiness, you won't delay reaching your destination just because of it.

Recommended song: 'Incubus - Talk shows on mute'

So many times i've talked against faith and how people tend to have faith for things that doesn't exist. Now i'm pushed against the wall depending on faith.

Faith for something that i'm not sure it's real, but that i have to believe as real if i want to stop this madness, this pain that's eating me from the inside.

I need to believe in you.

There's only one chance, one last chance to change the misconceptions in my world and reveal the real truth behind the personality scam that's been my life lately. I have to plan my moves very carefully since i only got three days to accomplish this task.

There's no room for mistakes, not anymore. One mistake and the whole plan will come down, back to the bottom of this cliff, where what's left of the puzzle is about to collapse. I have the power and the hability to do it. I'm willing to make any sacrifices it takes, and i've done a lot already.

This pain shall vanish... forever. Give me... that... one chance...

Recommended song: 'Oasis - (Probably) All in the mind'

I was looking at the meaning of the word and it says something like "mental disorder characterized by delusions of persecution and suspicion of others, yadda, yadda, bla bla bla..."

C'mon, it's not a mental disorder, it's a gift! To a certain degree - of course. Mix a bit of paranoia with some pessimism, a piece of mistrust tendency and a lot of hypocrisy; and man, believe me, you'll become the smartest person in the world. Always prepared for bad things, always aware of liars and cheaters; and always looking at the risks and possible losses of all situations.

Because if something can go wrong, it'll go wrong, twice, if you didn't expect it. And if you trust someone blindly, it will cheat you hard if you don't know him/her enough. And if you jump in a hole without looking to its bottom, you'll definitely fall on some peaks - ala Mortal Kombat.

And no, this is not a negative post, it's a reality based one. Seein' only the good side of things is useless.

Recommended song: 'Incubus - Here in my Room'